anja has spent 3 of the last 4 nights sleeping next to daddy instead of me for the first time in her life.

a pivot.

she says it’s ‘cuz she wants to avoid dreaming this dream she has “every few years” where it’s just the 2 of us and i turn into a witch and she feels a tickle in her stomach.

i asked what she meant by witch, if she wants to tell me more.

she said i had 3 heads.


last night, i dreamt the 3 of us were somehow selected to go on the next space shuttle trip:

there are 2 shuttles.

we will be on one with only 2 experienced adults. the other one has more experienced people.

we are at some event at anja’s previous preschool. crowded. the half bathroom has fabric over the sink, & figurines. i’m guessing amy doesn’t want the crowd to use the bathroom much. they have anyways. it’s dirty. i clean the toilet after using it.

we are at some outdoor huge gathering at dusk->night. reminds me a bit of the outdoor space at lawrence hall of science. we are leaving soon.

we are indoors with 2 moms. we bid goodbye, mention we are going on the shuttle.

we are driving there. ari does some calculations. we had thought it was going to be 2 days but suddenly realize it’s 10.

i should contact our family and friends to let them know.

i am feeling discomfited.

we have received nearly no training.

i would feel more at ease if i at least knew what to expect: how to eat, sleep, pee, poo, floss, brush teeth.

how will i take care of anja?

i know i always feel stressed/unsettled in the unknowing, and when i can’t control those things, even if everything will be fine.

we are on the shuttle.

anja for some reason has an open mason jar drink. we are worried it will drop and crash and shards of glass will float everywhere.

it drops, doesn’t crack, but i get it and look around for where to properly dispose of it.

i wake.

it is 7:30am.

i’ve slept 8.5 hours.

a lot; unusual for me.

i mistakenly set the alarm for 5pm instead of 5am.

of course.

feeling well slept is incredible.

now it’ll take some cleverness to work a walk/yoga in though.




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