1:10am & i might as well turn off the alarm for yoga b/c there’s no way enough sleep will have been had by then.

sleeplessness visits, it seems, when Spirit/God has a lot to do thru me

& it must be done in solitude

& this way i get that time.

i sat

on the couch

for a long while.

it was silent.

i listened.

i need a witness. Cassie. @ leapnow. just the 2 of us. must be filmed. need tripod for iPhone.

clear: witness needs to be powerful. space needs to be a bit removed. not shared (for now). so i can be as big and loud and whatever unplanned thing as possible. it needs to be filmed.

The Pod can’t be ‘public performance art’ as in a rope circle or clear box at Walnut Park.


realizing i can’t be fettered by making sure it’s sane enough to be kid-friendly and something consensual to passers-by.

video (perhaps streaming, in future) makes this possible.

video curates the audience, allows the audience to self-select, to stop viewing when they want/need to.

what is it about marina abramovic’s work that disturbs me?

what is the difference btw. amma hugging and marina gazing?

marina’s somehow feels like it has that aspect: it’s all about her, the ‘artist’, possibly ‘ego’.

it may not be.

i don’t know.

but i have that feeling/wondering.

also – degree of Light in marina? i am unsure.

a lot of clarification happening. the 6 hrs. w/KW, performance artist friend, Friday, including the time with the other artists at the residency. watching the documentary on Marina.

becoming clear, aware, my strengths, what i contain, bring.


the past 2 decades have been about body practices, clearing the system, spiritual practice; edge experiences.

HB: what have you been secretly training for all these years?

everything coming together. converging. i see.


want to add notes i wrote in my journal early yesterday morning, from this article, bolding mine:


By the classical definition art performance is a live artistic act where different media are in use, and where the artist, whose role is central, is affecting the audience on the emotional and intellectual plan. It is usually attractive in its visual, sound and verbal forms, leading toward catharsis. In order to affect audience performance is usually shocking, violent and strange in manifestation, basing its influence on external effects and sensations.

In (spi)ritual the stress is on internal transformation of the artist and the audience. In a way it is working with human psyche as artistic material. Visually it is simple. I use methods of lecture, conversation, distribution of printed matter, slide projections and manipulation of some ordinary objects and natural materials. More important is that what is happening on the spiritual level, which is invisible, but powerful. I could define it as transmission of spiritual energy, or inspiration, from artist to the audience, and a specific feed-back. So, (spi)ritual is not working on the level of senses, or intellect, and that’s why it doesn’t need visual, sound or verbal attractiveness. Instead, it is based on spiritual exchange in the direct contact between the artist and spectator. All used techniques, objects and materials are just a milieu which supports that exchange. (Spi)rituals are usually based on telepathy, magic, and on shamanistic tradition of the past. (Spi)rituals are attempts to transmit artistic inspiration directly, without intermediary.

August 3, 1991


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