11 years ago, when I first bumped into Mysore-style Ashtanga Vinyasa, i flipped through the David Swenson book and wrote, on a now-faded yellow post-it note “Roadkill Asana :)” for a posture that basically looked like roadkill to me back then.
for Halloween, that year, to my own amusement, i was Roadkill Asana, a bunny with tiretracks, bloody guts spilling out.
well, this morning, JS (my teacher) had me try that asana – Tittibhasana A, B, and C.
i laughed at the ridiculousness and seeming impossibility of it as i gave it a shot. i caught myself in a flicker of dramatization – expressing how difficult it was instead of just f*cking doing it.
“impossible?” he asked, seemingly ready to walk away and give up with me.
i refused to have it be impossible. i found ferocity and tried again as he instructed.
“outside your comfort zone,” he stated afterwards.
“edge of impossible,” i responded.
“close your mouth. long breaths,” he said as i did backbends.
i looked to KC (my friend and JS’s assistant this morning) to spot drop backs, grateful for the feminine to craugh (cry & laugh) with.
i am an edgewalker.
this is among the reasons i love this practice. the impossible becomes possible.
(like in Authentic Movement, the invisible becomes visible.)
i left with that glimpse of knowing of my capacity.
there are many places in my life where what i am capable of is beyond what i believe is possible or even let myself imagine. i’m aware that’s where i’m at with ‘Visionary’, ‘Creator of New Worlds’ – the creation of the structure through which to offer what i’m here to offer.
what am i capable of creating
beyond the confines and rigidity of my mind?